Now I’m again writing you a few lines, my dear friend Apollon Nicolayevich, and again to make an extraordinary request. (Did you receive my letter of yesterday in which I wrote to you that Katkov might perhaps send you in two or three weeks’ time two hundred roubles? I asked you most earnestly to help me and to divide that money (one hundred to Emily Fiodorovna, fifty to Pasha at once, and to keep the remaining fifty (also for Pasha), without telling him about it, and to hand it over to him after two months). Owing to an urgent cause and an important reason I must dispose of the money differently. Namely: hand over one hundred to Emily Fiodorovna, and fifty to Pasha now; give the remaining fifty roubles, my dear friend, to Anna Nicolayevna Snitkin, Anna Gregorevna’s mother. You may let her know through Pasha that she should call on you to get it. Or rather we ourselves will write to her, and she will call on you. When leaving Petersburg we pawned, I believe, all our movables, all our furniture, and all our things. For a whole year Anna Nicolayevna paid the interest (a very high one too) for us out of her pocket—but now she herself has great expenses, and although she does not ask us for money to pay the interest and continues to pay it as before, we must help her now and just at this moment. And Pasha, I will send to somehow, if I have money later, in two months’ time. Don’t disappoint me, my precious friend, don’t disappoint me; but do all these commissions which have a most vital importance for me, I earnestly entreat you. I shall try my best to prevent them all from worrying you much; I will ask them. Good-bye for the present. I embrace you closely.
Wholly your F. Dostoevsky.
PS. Last night I had a fit, so violent, that I have not recovered yet and I am aching all over; in particular my head aches unbearably.
PS. I am so distracted, everything is muddled up in my head because of the fit. I wrote a letter to Pasha, a most urgent one; but, although he has given me his address, I am afraid to send it to him, because he may have moved again to new rooms, and I ask you to hand over the letter to him. My dear friend, Apollon Nicolayevich, forgive me for all this unconscionable trouble I am giving you; but the letter to Pasha, which I enclose here, is so highly important to me and it deals with a question so affecting my heart and soul that nothing can be more important to me than its speedy delivery. Be my benefactor. You have only to send this letter to him through some one at the Address-Office. It is close to where you live and you will find it at once.—In any event, I also inscribe on the letter the address of Pasha’s late rooms, which also are not far from your house. Be my benefactor and deliver it to him immediately.